Thursday, November 13, 2008

My Thoughts...Unabridged yet Incomplete

Starting to find new ways to freedom, or rather, a whole new experience. I really don’t know what I’m writing, or rather now, typing. I only know that my mind is flying 3*10^8 times my writing speed (the speed of light). Excuse myself deviating a bit from solid literature at times to the more technological stuffs, me being an electronics engineering graduate find it quite difficult to eliminate the stuff I had savored and devoured day and night for the past 4 years…the marking of the end of 4 years being away by just 1 day…Yes, my life as a student has come to an end…the life I had been leading since the past 18 years…but now with a heart so full of inquisitiveness and unanswered questions still lingering over as though it is blocking my whole soul. Now, I’m just being a machine, just typing what comes to my mind without thinking, but I should be thinking, inside my so called brain, or I would like to use the generally used term, the mind; but as I told, having a strong technically oriented face to my life, I can’t dispense with being practical; they say mind is an abstract term, which doesn’t really exist, or putting it in other words, the brain according to the technical purists and heart according to the literary purists…from which I find it hard to choose. Because, it is a literary figure I wanted to become but fate made me an engineer…and the two according to the common man (the clan in which I’m also included) believe are absolute opposites. So, kindly bear with the absurdity in my ‘technical-kissed’ ‘trying-to-be literary’ language...
My many experiences and experiments with my life taught me many things which I would like to share…though I’m not of a grandmother’s age to say so. Or I should say, it is not the experience in my life that mattered, but how gutsy I was while experimenting with it, because I have done…but have definitely not crossed the boundaries my family kept on me…no…I don’t want to lie, not here at least…I did cross…I have crossed…I’m crossing…not one but the many boundaries my family and religion have forbidden me to do. So if the question is, whether I have boundaries or not, the answer is a straight ‘yes’. So the next question will be obviously what sort of boundary it is (well, all these questions matters only if you are quite interested in my topic. But, considering the fact that you’ve brought yourself into reading this, I hope I’m not boring you completely. Even critics can read it if they please because I like nothing better than someone pointing out my mistakes and better yet, telling me how I can improve…well, I know it’s rather too much to ask though…).
So, coming to the boundary question again, I would like to say, the only boundary that I ever had in my life is the boundary I created for myself, and in my personal case it is the boundary of my dignity. Things will be different for different people…it should be like that. After all, people are born different; and we should respect the differences. There will be a contradiction in that case…the question being concerned about the intention of the person…the much discussed topic…whether we should respect the difference of opinion of someone like a terrorist also. I would like to tell the reader with this confusion a simple fact that here we’re on the discussion of boundaries, and not exactly opinions and fanaticism, although they’re not mutually exclusive (courtesy: my mathematics lessons). I promise you, though; we’ll come to the topic sooner or later, I can tell you, may be at some point of my life. But as it is a promise, I’m bound to keep it, no derelictions in that…take my word.
Boundaries, as far as I’m concerned, can do no harm, may be it can hurt but can never harm. So, respecting the differences should also be harmless. So, that is human mind after all, starting with a thought of the moon, ending up in the general down-to-earth issues faced by a daily human, born out of a bit of eccentricity from my part, born out of the inherent surge to put something in my own words, to make something new, or to be different, or to create…after all the God’s profession and mankind’s basic instinct aims the same…and that is creation (the word never to be read as destruction).

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